Where do I start? The words do not easily come out. My heart has been troubled lately. Ever since I've changed the look and theme of my blog, I've been searching inside wondering "is this the way you want me to write my blog, Lord?"
Have I been reflecting more of the world than of God? I know that my reasons for sharing my posts haven't fully been for His glory, and that is wrong. I feel so confused, like I'm being pulled in two different directions. I want to be myself, but sometimes I second guess myself. It's like I'm embarrassed be who I am. I want Him to be evident in my life, even when I post. I want my readers to see God when they read my thoughts. But have you?
I'm afraid that my life isn't what God wants it to be. Am I trying to fight His plan? I wasn't aware of it, but I keep getting that uneasy feeling that something just isn't right.
Maybe it's what I've been writing. I guess I feel guilty for switching to a more "me-centered blog."
I want Him to get the glory, not me. I'm so selfish.
Please, my dear readers, forgive me for my motives. I'm sorry that you had to be involved in my conflict. Please pray for me, I need to get my life right.
As for now, I feel as if I should cancel the fashion challenge. I'm sorry, but maybe I will do it again some other time.
My heart is heavy, and I feel guilty for not using this blog for Him. I won't be continuing my Be Bold series anymore, either. I'm sorry if you enjoyed reading it, but on account of the sin in my motives, I must delete much of my posts that I wrote since I changed.
Alright, Lord, I did it. I confessed, and I'm truly very sorry for sinning against You. Please forgive me, and let my readers forgive me too. I'm Yours, Lord. Change my heart, and use this blog for Your glory and praise. Amen.